Four Years

Four years ago I lost my dad.

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It was, and remains to be the worst day of my life so far.

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My dad was my hero in so many ways.  I looked up to and admired him so much.  I was the definition of a “daddy’s girl.”

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He gave me strength, courage, a strong sense of self – but most of all – he was just a really good dad.

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And I miss him an incredible amount, every single day.

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Losing a parent is a loss like no other I’ve ever experienced.  In a lot of ways it’s made me stronger I suppose but it’s a strength that I’d rather be without if it meant my dad could still be here.

Luckily I have the most amazing family and friends around me and it’s through their love and strength and our faith that I’ve managed.  I don’t think there will ever be a day where I don’t miss my dad, there is forever a hole in my heart.  But I feel so grateful to be able to look back on all that he taught me and all that he left with me and smile.

Now go hug your dad…and give him one extra for me.

  • Khushboo

    Hi Cait. I lost my dad 4 years ago too and could have written this post myself. Losing a parent is harder than you could ever imagine and I would do anything to have my dad still around. The only thing we can take comfort out of is the memories. Thinking of you today, Cait.

  • Sarena (The Non-Dairy Queen)

    Oh Cait, I’m so sorry you had and have to go through this. It sounds like you were blessed with an incredible father. I’m glad you have an amazing support system. Many hugs to you today!

  • Julie H. of Spinach and Sprinkles


  • Mindy

    Thinking of you!

  • Gina @ Running to the Kitchen

    Thinking of you today, Cait. I can’t even imagine how hard it must be. I find myself thinking more and more about my parents’ mortality as they (and I) age and have to quickly push the thought out of my mind otherwise I’m overcome with sadness.

  • Jo

    Wow – I’ve been reading you for at least that long and I never knew about your father. I’d often wondered why there was never a mention of him. I will do as requested and my thoughts are with you. You are very strong – seemingly always smiling through the hard times (is it just me or did you handle your break up like a trooper?!) Thanks again for sharing.

  • Jamie

    So sorry you had to go through this. Sending thoughts your way!

  • janetha [meals & moves]


  • Margarita

    My thoughts are with you… I lost my dad when I was seven… I was so young and did not really know how to handle my feelings and for about a year, I waited for everyone else’s dads to die too. What a horrible wish that was but I think my little self was so confused and did not understand why my dad had to die. Eventually I learned that everyone has their own time, my dad’s just came too early. I don’t have very many memories of him, but I hold on to what I have.

  • Claire @ Live and Love to Eat

    So touching. Sending virtual hugs your way – I couldn’t even imagine losing my dad. xo

  • Molly

    i lost my daddy a little over a month ago unexpectadely– i feel your pain & loss. I am only 20 years old. It really hurts me to think he won’t be at my college graduation, walking me down the aisle one day, or be present for the birth of any future grandchildren. my daddy was a one of a kind man. he was amazing and the Lord’s definition of Love. I miss him so much as I know you miss your dad. I wish I could at least have one more conversation with him, give him a hugeee big hug, and remind him how much I love/cherish/respect/look up to him. I miss my daddy.

  • Maura @ Running to Saks

    I’m so sorry Cait. Thanks for sharing with us. Sending my thoughts your way!

  • Katie @ Talk Less, Say More

    I couldn’t even imagine; you are so strong and I’m sending hugs your way. <3

  • Michelle A

    Love you Cait! Was thinking about you today. All my love to you and your family.

  • Laura Ann

    Such a sweet post. I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope you were able to find a little bit of peace in your day today. *Hugs*

  • Danielle

    This is a beautiful post. *Hugs*

  • Shannon ~ My Place In The Race

    I’m so sorry Cait. I lost my Mom 4 years ago this November. It truly is life changing. Sending love and hugs your way! XOXO

  • Katie

    Awww, crying. Obviously. I’m so sad that you and I have both had to go through the pain of losing a parent (waaay too early!) – but I can tell you that your strength has been a major blessing for me. Love you friend. Praying for you.

  • Life’s a Bowl

    Sorry about your father passing. I was a huge daddy’s girl when I was younger too, there’s something so special about the father-daughter bond… Sending you warm wishes.

  • Aja

    Aw, Cait. This made me cry. Gary was wonderful, funny, and kind. Our entire family misses him greatly. Love you lots.

  • Maura @ My Healthy ‘Ohana

    Those pictures are priceless…looks like you had an amazing, loving father! I’m so sorry for your loss. My dad is 80 years old (he had kids late in life, me at 49 and my brother at 51!), so I often think about spending as much time as we can with him, especially now that I have a daughter! Thank you for sharing this, thinking of and praying for you!

  • Brittnie (A Joy Renewed)

    HI Cait, I lost my mom when I was 7 yrs old. She died of Lupus. Loosing a parent is hard, at any age. Hugs and strength to you!